The problem is that there is a core fundamental belief that is at issue. If I am truly born gay then of course, “Why should I receive counseling to try and change who I was born to be?” Isn't it interesting that the rest of us are saying the same thing? I was born straight; I just want the opportunity to heal from the brokenness that lies to me and see who I really am. Why can’t I as a straight male who at one time had same-sex attraction say the same thing and get help? Does this make sense? There is no question here of hate or discrimination, only an offering of healing.
Gay community says: I am gay. I was born this way. Let me be who I am.
Trans-gendered community says: “I am born in the wrong body. Let me change so that I can be who I want to be”
Healing for homosexual sin says: “I was born right, but feel wrong. Help me change so that I can be who God meant for me to be”
There is such a double standard and if we don’t wake up to the issue, then we are going to lose the right to get help as we see fit. I spent most of my adolescent years fighting the feelings of attraction to other men. I acted on my attractions; I felt for other men and I had sex with other men. I have been there. I have wanted to claim my identity and say “I am gay!” However, that never felt right to me and it never fit. I never truly felt that I was not meant to be the man God made me to be. There is a great line that has to be crossed to say, MY GOD IS WRONG. As often as I tried to cross that line, I couldn’t and be happy. So, I found happiness when I found healing and began to see the man I was meant to be. Now the gay agenda wants to take that option of healing away from others. The gay community wants to say, “We want the right to be who we want to be, but you can’t have that same right.” And, “We will take away your right to see if there is a way to be who God intended you to be.”
The issue of therapy or counseling for those struggling with same-sex attraction should be their choice. What is the difference between counseling, conversion therapy, or reparative therapy? Isn’t all therapy meant to repair what has been broken and heal what makes us hurt? No matter the label that recent opponents have placed on it, the fact remains that healing is still healing. Regardless of what you think of the topic, counseling is still meant to heal and repair. Just because the “gay agenda” is now saying that you can’t say that – doesn’t mean that the rest of us don’t count. We are here! We are here! We, the ones who feel like God has changed us and that counseling did help. Are you listening? We are here!
Let me give you another scenario. What if you had a son who was struggling with drugs or alcohol? What lengths would you go to save him? Would you take away his car keys, lock him in his room, refuse to give him money for anything because you didn’t know what he would use it for? Would you try and put him in a treatment facility even if he didn’t want to go? As a parent, I would do just about anything to keep my child from getting lost in the hopelessness of any addiction, or for that matter, any pain. President Obama is asking parents to stop trying to help their children see both sides of the coin. What is wrong with realizing that a child might actually benefit from at least hearing, “You have a choice so look at all your choices? Don’t let anyone demand that you are a certain way.” Now we have “the gay agenda” attempting to sue caregivers who tried to help them earlier in life. Be very cautious. When we start allowing lawsuits to punish those who did not mean harm, but were only trying to help and offer hope, we open a door that will not go anywhere good. In the example of the son addicted to drugs – would you allow that son to “sue” his parents for attempting to help?
With regards to suicide, we are running scared trying to address the fear of what to do when a trans-gendered individual or a “gay struggler” wants to commit suicide because they feel ostracized. Do you realize that I too contemplated suicide at one time in my young adult life? Why, because I was gay and not allowed to feel gay and be gay? NO! I contemplated suicide because I knew the man God made me, but could not figure out a way to find that man. He was lost in my brokenness. What you are not hearing about, are the countless number of folks who were hurt and hurting until they FOUND freedom from homosexuality. We are here! WE ARE HERE! Are we as a society concerned with those suicides? With those individuals who now may have nowhere to turn? Will we be willing to look at their hopelessness and potential feelings of suicide?
All I am asking is to be cautious. I understand both sides of this discussion. However, when one person or people group has the power to take away the options for the rest of us, then we are in grave danger. No one can take away my story. No one can change what I feel or what I have seen in my life. However, if we allow counseling, healing, hope for folks who want to change to be “stopped” because of a few, then we lose out on the freedoms of all the others. Those seeking change should continue to have the freedom to change. Out of my healing I should be able to offer the same choice to someone else who wants to change. Gay agenda, what are you afraid of? We are here! We are not going away. We have been changed. I am sorry that leaders before us, including some leaders of the fallen Exodus Ministries did not do the work needed to fully change and therefore ruined a lot for the rest of us. But those of us, who continue to fight the good fight, seek hope, seek change, and become the men and women God has made us to be, are still here, we’re still in the battle, and we will not be silent. If you truly want freedom for yourselves and the ability to choose your own identity, can’t others still have the same freedom?
If God is for us, who can be against us. Romans 8:31
Lee Preston is Co-founder and Co-Director of Shadow of His Wings Ministry located in South Texas. Shadow of His Wings Ministry is a healing and counseling ministry seeking to offer hope and recovery to the broken-hearted and the wounded.
Visit us at www.shadowofhiswingsministry.com